How to do academia

Thepracticaldev, Half listening to conference talks

Is there a recommended style guide for theses? Not formatting, but linguistic style? I’m presuming there must be one, or they would not generally be written so horribly. I would like to know where this gaggingly awful style is elucidated so that I may ape it and thereby adhere to the expectations of this noble institution that is the thesis, and also maybe work out what small freedoms I may have to write comprehensibly, interesting etc.