Melbourne
a.k.a. Naarm
October 17, 2021 — March 19, 2025
Suspiciously similar content
My current hometown.
1 Flesh-eating bacteria
- Flesh-eating bacteria encroach upon Melbourne: Buruli in Victoria
2 Saunas and spas
- Sauna Goose is a Danish-style sauna in Melbourne.
- Spa Wars - The Paris End is excellent Spa gossip
- Mornington Peninsula Hot Springs Spa & Massage Victoria is mildly controversial but I still like it TBH
- Alba Thermal Springs & Spa is heir competitor across the road.
3 …as Naarm
The site of the modern city is known as Naarm in the Boonwurrung and Woiwurrung languages1. Naarm as a name has the advantage that the way local English-speakers pronounce Melbourne is baffling to outsiders whereas Naarm is conventionally pronounced as it is conventionally spelled.2 That said, I suspect that the way English speakers say ‘Naarm’ might be technically incorrect compared to its historical version because people seem vague about that. On the other hand, the sadly precarious state of the Woiwurrung language means that few people will notice. So at least this mispronunciation likely annoys fewer people than does the mispronunciation of ‘Melbourne’.
Anti-woke types use ‘Melbourne’ exclusively. The very-woke use ‘Naarm’ exclusively. I personally think that arguments about naming things are a low-value use of time, and that it is generally OK that a place has different names in different languages, and that it is fine to choose the appropriate name for the context, which is what I do. FWIW I think 新金山 (Xīnjīnshān, New Gold Mountain”) is a pretty awesome name for this city, just sayin’.
4 Veg boxes
5 Incoming
https://melbourne.nerdnite.com/
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Melbourne’s density drops precipitously from high-rises to single-family homes, with very little medium density between. Melbourne’s Missing Middle’s signature recommendation—a new Missing Middle Zone—would enable six-storey, mixed-use development on all residential land within 1 kilometre of a train station and 500 metres of a tram stop—building an interconnected network of 1,992 high-amenity, walkable neighbourhoods.
Melbourne’s Missing Middle envisions Parisian streetscapes across all of inner urban Melbourne, along our train and tram lines and near our town centres. Gentle, walk-up apartments, abundant shopfronts, sidewalk cafes and sprawling parks replacing unaffordable and unsustainable cottages.
Footnotes
kinda; it seems it might not be that conveniently simple↩︎
Naam is probably a better spelling for US English speakers who pronounce their Rs after vowels.↩︎